Halve Mein Hash 291 - September 3, 2009 - Voorheesville, NY
Where: Albany, NY
Scribes: Redtail Swallows, Willy Wanker
Hare: Willy Wanker, 6.9 on the Rectum Scale
Dairy Pop Queen Top, Seize Her Cooch, Redtail Swallows, Ginger Slaps, Link Hardknob, Just Vanessa, Cocktail (hound), Virgin Mike
You know those scrubby lotions that women and poptop spend lots of money on to slough off the dead skin cells? Well, if you had cum to tonight's hash (laid by 6.9 on the Rectum Scale and Willy Wanker) everyone could have saved lots of money and diverted it to beer because there was so much shiggy on this trail, I am missing my dead and my formerly alive skin cells after this hash. A new added bonus to hashing! No need to exfoliate anymore, especially for Seize Her Cooch, Just Vanessa, Link Hard Knob (who exfoliates every day I am sure), Poptop, Cocktail (hound), Ginger Slaps, Poptop, Virgin Mike (who came all by himself on the bus with gay men), and me (Redtail). We met at Smitty's in voorheesville on this fine evening, I was delayed slightly from a minor traffic incident involving my rear bumper and someone else's bumper and the Skin-neck-titty police. Cocktail and I finally made it to the start and soon hares were away. Trail went up up and away into the shiggy. Link and I deviated from the pack and tried to short cut to the hares and we were not successful. We ended up abandoning our shiggy shortcut, running through neighborhoods and basically had to start trail over again and made it to the beer check just as it was getting dark. The hares were away again, but no worries, for there was beer and cookies for us (and a baseball game to watch). Trail started again, it led to a wanker's house where there was more beer, and ginger slaps put on a show for all of us. There was a hose involved (amazingly, I don't remember moving that). There was more trail, but it was dark so we stayed and drank more beer and more beer. It was unanimously decided that we like the new hash house, especially hashing in it without the wanker who lives there. Circle commenced. Ginger Slaps demented our virgin. will he come back? who knows, he r*n to freaking fast anyway. Virgin Mike and Just Vanessa were the FRB and FBI. Some hot blondie attached to an anchor showed up. She didn't go home with anyone though (this time). Hares drank for a shiggilicious trail. I drank for getting into a car accident on the way to the hash, going to IAH tomorrow (err-today in about 3 hours actually on-6-days-of-hashing-on!!!!) and being a September birthday. Everyone drank for blood on trail (except maybe sieze her cooch, because she wore pants), but Just Vanessa had the most blood. A bunch of people drank for getting lost on trail when Willy had to go find them and tell them where to go (Seize her, Just Vanessa, Virgin Mike, Link Hard Knob). Seize Her Cooch got Dead Ass Last for the "eagle" runners. 6.9 and Willy were neck and neck for the hashit, but in the end Willy won out and gets to carry it on trail next time. Something about taking us through lots of poison ivy on trail or something. After circle, more dance party and more of ginger slaps and the hose (I guess a substitute until we get the hot tub?). The party was still going on when I left (I really have to pack, for more hashing today!!!) and I think I saw ewoks dancing around a fire circle as I left. And guess what? Thanks to tonight's hash I don't have to pack my fancy exfoliating cleanser for my trip because thanks to today's trail, I have no skin left to use it on. Thanks to the hares for a very shiggy trail!!! On-on to IAH, Redtail Swallows
If you have anything to add, send a note to firstname.lastname@example.org.